Ask Paul

Wow, I totally have been spacing out... err... I mean... on a top secret mission... and have neglected my duties to answer the "Ask Paul" questions.

So, in a highly efficient manner (efficient is the fancy term for lazy) I will do a very exciting speed-round to the questions that have been floating in the queue;

Travis Latrine said...

Dear Monsuer Filthy, Whats it like to be a Secretion, was it more than you thought it would be or were your expectations too high? And were you a Secretin before you were a Secretion?

A: To be a Secretion is to be devoid of expectations. It's kind of a duality thing. Rather than getting "good" or "bad" presents for your birthday, just imagine not having a birthday at all. Secondly, I was a Secretin before the term even existed. (yes, I'm old)

otter of no way out said...

i have to ask two of the most important questions ever
1) what is the meaning of life? Are we just simple spiraling coils of DNA, or is there a purpose are we just a speck of dust in an atom under the nail of a bigger person in a simmilat universe
the second is
is there a god? and if so why do bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people
is there a just and loveing god?

A: 1) The meaning of life is 42. Haven't you read Hitchiker's Guide to The Galaxy? Also, always bring your towel.

2) Yes, there is a god, and he is Lemmy from Motorhead, and he doesnt have to do things for any sort of reason. I mean really, would you like be the one to tell him he's being a dick? I don't. Nose goes! *touches nose*....ha! sucker!

Anonymous said...

Do you have a younger brother?

A: Yes, and I embarrass him by just existing. I'll point him out to everyone at the next show he comes to.

DADOO said...

What is the atomic weight of cobalt?

A: 58.9. Why does everyone ask me this?!

Anonymous said...

Hey Paul, if you werent called the Secretions, what would you guys be called? Just so we all know "what could have been".

A: I believe the four runners up from the Secretions were as follows:

1. Mickie Rat and his Magical Sun-Shine Orchestra

2. Zed Lepplin

3. the Phenomenalnauts (man, that would have been awkward!)

4. Paul Filthy Will Join This Band and Ruin His Social Life

Honestly, I think Danny and Mickie shoulda voted on the first one, but I woulda been cool with any of them...except maybe number 4.

Thanks for listening! Thats all I got at the moment!

Send in those questions, kiddies!