"The Secretions are men of peace in a world of mayhem. They are poets and onanists and bloodsucking freaks. They are punk rock."

- Joe Queer of the Queers
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Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Almost as hard to watch as two girls one cup...

Posted by Danny Secretion on their myspace blog...

"What the fuck are we thinking?

The last time the Secretions played a "Friday Night Concert In the Park" series show was 2 summers ago. We were on tour with the Teenage Harlets and were in Chicago the night before. We flew back to Sacramento, got about 2 hours of sleep, played, got 2 more hours of sleep, then flew back to the midwest to continue our tour.

Last summer we weren't Bucho enough to be asked to play, but I guess the fine folks who put this concert series together figured they would throw us another bone and ask us again. We told them that we would only do it if our strict rider was met:

1. 1 Bottle of Jack Daniels (Mickie)
2. 1 Bottle of Makers Mark (Danny)
3. 1 Bottle of Princess Fluffy's Sparkling Apricot Cider (Paul)

They had a hard time finding Paul's beverage of choice, but our requests were met.

When we flew out to play, we ended up losing more money than you could imagine, so we figured this year we have to do something equally stupid...

LET'S SEE HOW MANY TIMES WE CAN PLAY IN 1 DAY!!!!!

So we are getting up at about 5am to be at the MY58 television studios by 6am to set up, sound check and be ready to perform by 7am at every commercial break. We will play off and on from 7am to 9am...SHOW 1

We get breakfast and try to get some sleep for about 2 hours.

We show up at the National Public Radio studios by 12:30pm to be ready to set up, sound check and be ready to perform from 2pm-3pm and be interviewed on air...SHOW 2

Get lunch and head over to Cesar Chavez Park. Set up and sound check at about 4pm.

Watch Baby!, No-Goodniks, and our brothers in Final Summation perform. We do our thing...SHOW 3

Get something to eat and drink massive amounts of coffee.

Load in to Old Ironsides at 9pm to prepare for our final show of the evening. Play, drink, collapse...SHOW 4

Who knows, we may even get a wild hair up our asses and play an afterparty show at Casa De Chaos...SHOW 5?"


Here are my predictions for this day:

1. Dan is going to get all stressed out and grumpy for some of the day (BUT...)
2. By 7:00pm, when he is good and drunk, Dan's going to start hugging people.
3. Mickie is going to get tired and grumpy toward the end of the day, until we feed him more Jack Daniels.
4. Way too much caffeine is going to be consumed and their "food and rest" breaks will consist of a lot of pooping.
5. Paul is going to smoke cigarettes and make obscene gestures.
6. Everyone is going to get wasted.
7. They aren't going to be asked to play on KCRA again. Ever.
8. The park show will feature some kind of superjam with at least one Final Summation member.
9. The van is going to smell fucking horrible.

So, Don't Miss It!

Click here to read about the amazing Jerry Perry and the park shows.

Click here to read about who is performing on each park show.

1 comment:

Mr.Reynoso said...

I really do love ya'!